The Big Green Monster!

No, I’m not referring to the Hulk. I am in fact referring to Jealousy. In most cases, there is at least one jealous person in any relationship and maybe, worst case scenario both parties are jealous. But why? What’s the point?

Both men and women are as bad as each other for this. I’ve seen women look in disgust and hurt as their boyfriends take a passing glance at a random, but beautiful woman. Or men’s faces drop as their girlfriends exchange a smile with a fit stranger and you just know that there will be an atmosphere or an argument for the rest of the day between them. But it is really worth it? If you’re having a fantastic day, can a chance glance or smile to a stranger actually spoil it? For anyone who thinks it can, you have my sympathy.

Now I have nothing against jealous people themselves, but I simply don’t understand them. I myself don’t tend to feel jealous, not because I don’t care, which is how some jealous people validate their own ridiculousness, ‘I’m only arguing about it because I care’ which of course is a load of crap. I think perhaps that some men see it as a heroic thing. The whole,’ if anyone makes a pass at you I’ll deck’em ‘ approach if you will. It must be a macho thing, though I’m sure some guys think they are simply being ‘protective.’ As for women, well any excuse to shout at their man or create a bit of drama, maybe a cat fight to lighten the evening. As I have witnessed a fair few trussed up plastics ragging on their boyfriends for noticing another woman’s boobs (Well, duh. You ain’t the only woman with a pair and I sometimes even have trouble keeping my eyes to myself if it’s a particularly good pair :P ).

Those were more examples of petty and pathetic jealousy than anything else, but it can also come from people with low self esteem who think that at any given minute their partners will leave because they themselves simply aren’t good enough.  It can also come from guilt. If one has cheated then they will turn the tables on the other to protect themselves. But cheating after earning someone’s trust is simply unacceptable, and its people who cheat that cause most people insecurities in all future relationships.

The only jealousy I really understand is the former. If someone thinks that they are not good enough, that they are ugly or useless then they will be insecure. However, I wouldn’t class this as jealousy. I would class it as simply insecurity, something that often comes with low self esteem. So what about the rest?

Obsessive jealousy is usually a product of paranoia and often can’t be controlled as it is part of a condition. But what really ticks me off are people who are ‘petty’ jealous people.

Like women who are immediately suspicious of their boyfriends female friends, especially if they are really good friends. This kind of jealousy has affected me a fair bit, because most of my friends are male, therefore a good portion of my male friends’ girlfriends are immediately suspicious of me. I, of course find this to be ridiculous and somewhat pathetic. One of my friends actually, has been told that he’s not allowed to see me, ever, and he’s not even with the girl yet! If they do get together it will be a laugh and I do of course still see him. This girl seems to think that because I’m a female and therefore in possession of a Vagina that I am clearly sleeping with him ... why didn’t I see it before! In my opinion your partner should never be able to tell you that you can’t see your friends. But I think I might be alone on that one.

Speaking of friends, I know of lads whose girlfriends’ text them constantly while they are out with their friends. If they don’t text back, they get a phone call – ‘Why didn’t you text me back?’ – Because he’s OUT you Bag-head! He’s out with friends trying to have a good time, but is spending his night out glued to his phone like an anti-social fool because you miss him or need him to pay attention to you all the effing time. Get some independence. If you’re boyfriend or girlfriend is out with his/her friends, leave them alone; let them have a good time! Simply ask for one text when they get in to let you know they are ok. That’s all it takes. If you mither them constantly you will push them away, especially with guys. They need space and ‘man time’ with their friends, not a clingy woman who needs updates as though the relationship were a bloody Twitter feed!  Geez!

Anyway, the other pointless kind of jealousy is the ‘did you just look at her?’ or ‘Did you just look at my girlfriend?’. The first is classic female. Women can be so quick to notice if a man looks at someone else’s boobs or bum, or even their face. The only way to stamp out this treacherous behaviour is to insist that your man walk in one of three ways; One – looking at the pavement at all times. Two- focus solely on you while you walk and therefore probably end up on the floor or walking into a post of some kind. And Three – Get them to walk with their face in your cleavage so they can’t look at any one else’s.  Oh, wait there is one more option ... Grow up! People look at people all the time, eyes meet smiles are exchanged etc.

As for the classic petty male statement of ‘did you just look at my girlfriend?’, followed either by a squaring-up of a total stranger or a fight, maybe you should answer a few questions? Is your girlfriend pretty? Do you seriously think that you are the only one in the world who has noticed that she is, in fact, gorgeous? Do you seriously think that she will stay with you if you keep being such a blundering . macho prat? If the answers are Yes, Yes, No. Then just chill and enjoy the fact that she has chosen you and no-one else.

And that’s what it comes down to. Trust. If you know that she chose you and you chose her and that you’re both agreed to be in a relationship, then that’s that.   There will always be attractive men or women around for each of you to notice. Men will always look at boobs, and women will always look at men’s packages. We are just more subtle about it. Sometimes I don’t even have to look at some of my lads to know that they are burning holes in some girls clothing with their lusty stares, you can feel the intensity.

Look but don’t touch is the rule. If you say you trust your partner then prove it. No needless arguments and accusations, no being suspicious of opposite-sex-friends and no clingy texting or calling. Just be together and enjoy each other :D.

Celebrity? Big Brother.

One of the happiest moments of my life as an occasional T.V watcher was the moment I heard that Big Brother had been axed. Low and behold, because nobody can come up with an original idea, it’s back again….. woop! (Insert tiredly sarcastic face here). But wait there’s more! It’s a ‘Celebrity’ version of the show, isn’t that great? Now, I’m not a big buff on celebrities, though I am vaguely aware of whom some people in the world are, actors and actresses mostly as well as bad mothers and plastic surgery hounds, but the people in the big brother house … who the hell are they? They are stretching the word ‘celebrity’ like the last teenie weenie bit of butter over the piece of toast that is your only hope of a decent breakfast, as well as being the last slice of the loaf. The only people I recognise are Jedward, because they shattered the hopes of so many GOOD singers when they advanced through the X factor, and Kerry Katona because she’s a god-awful mess. So I thought I’d look these people up…

 Now, unfortunately, the only newspapers willing to cover the brand new series of Big Brother are the crappy red-banner newspapers that live off of sensationalism, peoples personal lives and mistakes, so I have had to dabble in the pointless ramblings of The Mirror, who have, of course provided full ‘housemate profiles’ of the contestants. So that is where the information was found (I can already feel my eyes burning from the stinging juices of a bunch off gossip hounds pretending to publish important news) but here we go ….

Tara Reid – I do actually recognise her from the American Pie films which are epic J and I’ve seen her in a few scrubs episodes, but apart from that she is quite low profile and I didn’t know her by name. But apparently, she had some ‘botched plastic surgery that kept her in the headlines.’ Isn’t the Mirror a lovely paper?

Kerry Katona – Now despite my dislike for the Mirror, they pretty much sum Katona up perfectly - From triumph in the jungle in I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! to the humiliation of bankruptcy and cocaine allegations – basically we only know her for the bad stuff, and of course, the Iceland adverts. Not so much a celebrity as a failure, but at least she won the last reality show she was on (insert tarzan yodel here) :P

Amy Childs – I had no clue who she was. But I saw the words ‘from The only way is Essex’ and new I didn’t care anyway. Her speciality in this show, by the way, is owning a salon that creates ‘Vajazzles’ She basically spends her time sticking fake jewels on to women’s ‘Didcot ladygroves’ (Quote from the legend of Russell Howard :P) Oh, and she’s planning for second boob job? …. I hope it fails and they sag to her knees.

Paddy Doherty – Again, no clue. But he looks like he recently played in ‘the rise of the planet of the apes.’

 Darryn Lyons – His nickanme is, apparently ‘Mr Papparazzi’ Basically he’s a bag-head who likes to intrude on other peoples lives. But he did do ‘war photography’ which must have been interesting.

Lucien Laviscount – Never heard of him, but at least he is being sensible so far. He’s been in grange hill, waterloo road and coranation street, so he’s making a name for himself in the soap-world. I don’t mind a bit off Corrie myself :P

 Sally Bercrow – Now, I know that politicians are in the news increasingly often since they are doing such a good job of running our country…. But how the hell is the wife of a house of commons speaker a celebrity? Apart from the fact that she once posed for a photo in a bed sheet, I think a fair few people have posed in less somehow.

 Pamela Hasselhof – The hoff’s former wife, also in Baywatch. But besides that, not much. Though she was jailed for drink driving recently …. BAG- HEEAAADDD!

 Jedward – I need to say no more …

Bobby Sabel – a male model, of course, who has commitment issues. Apparently he would rather ‘be adored by all women than be tied down to one girl’ … player much?

So, whats my point? These people are hardly celebrities, obviously the real ones are too busy to sit in a badly-decorated house and be watched at all hours of the day and night by unemployed benefit theives or teenagers with nothing better to do, I’m sure there are other kinds of people who watch it but I think I may have nailed down about 85% of the audience there. What is interesting about it? Are our lives that boring that we have to watch other people who are ‘famous’ sneak in to bed with each other in the middle of the night and romp around like an old version of ‘The Sims’ Because that’s basically what it is. We know that Kerry will probably start fight with Amy childs and that Jedward will try and sing at some point and that every lame ass woman in that house will try and get it on with the male model. All that’s missing is a little bubble above their heads with a hunger, emotion and tiredness meter in it.

I only watched this pitiful waste of air-time once, and everyone was living in boxes for at least a day, one girl was even pretending to masturbate in her box, and I think that was only series 3 or something, god knows what will happen in this one …. The first live conception of a child – uncensored? Jedward actually sang a note – hazaarr! Miracles could happen, really.

That’s about it really, the watchers of Big brother need to get a job, or get a life. And channel five need a new idea, perhaps an educational show of some sort? At least now the jeremy kyle watchers will have something to watch after five pm….

 :D

Age Certified Stupidity?

In light of my recent blog about the ridiculousness of possible driving liscence restrictions, it occurred to me that perhaps age restrictions are becoming the new political correctness - Over dramatic, ineffective and a partial waste of time.

Are we going too far with age restrictions?

Now, don't get me wrong, the basic limits are useful and somewhat sensible. The 'no alcohol under 18' is a great one, same goes for tobacco, young children should'nt be able to freely buy alcohol or smokes, but, despite the age restiction, all you ever see these days are groups of kids in parks or on street corners surrounded by a wall of cheap cider bottles and cans while smoking so much that the haze of nicotine seems to cause swirly-pattern baldness and chronic idiocy. So where is it coming from if every shop is suppossed to I.D people? And if some shops aren't I.D-ing people then whats the point in the first place?

Restricitons that seem a bit too, what's the word... oh yes... STUPID, for me are the ones at places like argos or my local co-op. Now, upon visiting my local shop to buy a box of house-hold matches, I was informed that I wasn't 21 (Shock, horror, suprise, it's your birthday!)  and I was actually refused service over a box of cooks matches! I merely wanted to light afew candles, not cause a mass arson or to go round setting fire to people's faces. Then again, who's to say that you're less likely to be an arsonist after the age of twenty one?
A similar story occurred at argos when I went to buy an electric bread knife for the cafe that I work in. I had to be twenty one to buy that too. It is an ELECTRIC appliance! Unless i have an extention lead over twenty meters long I can't even give my neighbour an unwelcome hair cut, never mind cause significant 'social damage.'

So, I did some research into current age restrictions. Starting from the bottom ;-

You must be SIXTEEN to legally - buy petrol, spray paint, lottery tickets and liqueur chocolates. (and of course to have sexual intercourse, but one episode of jeremy kyle will prove that that principle was dead and buried long ago).

You must be EIGHTEEN to legally - buy tobacco, get a tattoo, buy 'adult magazines' and to buy butane gas and crossbows (what the hell?!). Also fireworks can be sold to those to are apparently over 18.
Surely more damage can be done with a butane gas cylinder/lighter, fireworks and a crossbow for god's sake, than a few matches or an electric bread knife!

And you must be TWENTY-ONE to buy knife blocks or bread knives etc, etc.
So remember to take your mum, or maybe your nan just to be safe, if you move out before your twenty-one and need some kitchen equipment.

So the only conclusion that I can come to is that, instead of calmly leaving the shop when refused service for matches and merely going home, is that I should have nipped down to the petrol station and the local armoury, buying some petrol, a butane cylinder and a cross-bow and arrows (all of which are available to 18 year olds), walking calmly back into the shop and placing the cylinder infront of that charming woman's till, dipping an arrow into some petrol, lighting the arrow by scratching it against HER BEARD, then leaving the shop again and firing the arrow into the cylinder, thereby destroying the shop and its crazy restictions. Especially when the paper shop two doors down sold me matches without so much as an I.D!

*Cough*... *Cough*... do excuse me, I lost myself there in the bitter memories... anyway... who is to say that responsibility comes with age? Surely if you walked into the local knitting circle and told the cute little old ladies that their pensions are being stopped, there would be more blood and broken knitting needles on the pavement than there would be if a twenty year old woman or man was to buy a box of matches or an electric bread knife to cut a loaf of granary bread or light afew candles for a cosy night in?

Until next time =)

New rules for 'young' drivers?

Hello World!
I have been away from the blogging world for several months now. Before I start I'd like to take this oppurtunity to thank the Douglas Macmillain Hospice for helping my brave nan through the last days of her battle with cancer. Love you always, Nan.

Ok, so I stumbled across a rather interesting and particularly infuriating article on confused.com just the other day entitled 'Not being allowed to drive after 11pm; It could happen'. I was curious, so I had a nosey.

The Pitch

It seems that Road Safety Charity 'BRAKE' have begun a campaign to change the way that driving liscences are issued. Doing this could, apparently, cut road deaths in the uk by giving drivers 'better training'.
As expected, this is of course targeted at young drivers only. The campaign director from BRAKE explained in a rather stereotypical, ignorantly over-generalised manor that - 'Young drivers and their behaviour hold the key to the future extent of the carnage on the roads ... one quarter of all road deaths and serious injury are caused by young drivers'

BACK UP A SECOND

One quarter of all road deaths? That's less than half. Who causes the other three quarters? Oh yes! people who are not considered 'young drivers'. Maybe its the guy who has been driving for 14 years and still thinks its ok to reverse out of his driveway onto a dual carriageway? Perhaps the old woman who is being considerate by going 20 miles an hour on a national road causing the idiot in the bmw or subaru impreza behind to over-take on a blind bend? Or maybe its the people in the right hand lane of the motor way who are technically 'overtaking' people, but are doing it at the highly unnecessary speed of 120 miles per hour, who then notice that this is their exit? But I know that there are some, more than enough, bag-headed idiots who have just passed their test, kit our their 13 year old renault clio and go drag racing on car parks and residential roads. And its these kind of douchebags who are causing the majority of considerate younger drivers all this grief.

The Restrictions

So, what exactly are BRAKE suggesting... get ready for the most ridiculous list in history...

1) A minimun learning period of one year - This the first money making part of this endeavour. I passed my test in 26 lessons and spent more than enough money. The average driving lesson is around £21. Therefore I spent £546 on my lessons. If everyone was forced to learn for a year, we would all spend £1092 on learning to drive using the one-hour-per-week basis, minus theory tests and driving tests. No thanks.

2)The first TWO YEARS of driving will be restricted, and a second driving test will be taken after these two resticted years - for what reason? If you ask a 30 or even a 60 year old driver to take another driving test then they would probably fail because, after the crap-your-pants hour of your life where you sit in a car with a total stranger who is holding and writing on a clip board (dun dun duuuunn), people find their own style of driving.

3) Restrictions on the time of day young people can drive - namely not after 11pm. Where's the sense in this? Your stopping them from driving on the road at times when there is hardly anybody on the road. Not that its right to race on residential streets, but if some fool of a person fancies a race, surely its better at 2am when the roads are empty than between 4 and 6 when the roads are full? Also, whats the point in having a car to get home safely from nights out or visiting friends if you have to be in earlier due to a curfew set by a government that groups all young people behind the wheel of a car with the same seriousness as a terrorist attack? Anyway...

4) Lower alcohol limits for young drivers. - If they can afford to lower the limit, it should be for everyone. In my opinion, anyone ever found drink driving should be banned from driving for life, and thats that.

5) No young passengers. - For crying out loud! How can you help the planet by encouraging the use of public transport and car-sharing, and then ban young people, who need to get to their oh-so-important educational insitutes from giving each other lifts. This will increase the number of young people with vehicles! Plus, driving your friends round and going to new places is all part of a young persons driving experience.

6) No motorway access for one year. - How the floofles are police suppossed to monitor that?

 And whats the point in having a car if you can only drive around the local roundabout for hours on end trying to get malteasers to roll across your dash board, but you have no friends in the car to help you when you drop the last one, because your not allowed to drive them around, then again its almost 11pm so you'd better get home quick sharp. But down worry, all these 'helpful' restrictions may very well reduce your car insurance by a few quid. so you will only be paying nine hundred and ninety nine thousand nine hundred and ninety nine pounds! Right on!

The Horrors of Clothes Shopping!

Clothes Shopping, or often just the word 'Shopping' is often enough to cheer a girl up and set a sparkle in their eye. There's nothing more relaxing than an afternoon of retail therapy ... NOT!
I was recently forced to venture out into the world of clothes shopping for some new jeans. I've only ever had two or three pairs of jeans at any one time and it just so happens that they both came in hole at the exact same time. So its either clothes shopping or having my foot come out of the hole at my knee every time I take a step (I think I may have exaggerated there just a little, but you get my point).
Anyway, I can honestly say that shopping for clothes that you actually need is way too stressful.

Just A Pair of Jeans
Going out to buy a pair of jeans sounds like a walk, or even an unassisted float in the park, but it isn't. All I was looking for was a pair of ordinary jeans, but the labels on jeans nowadays come in a variety of exciting colours and catagories and usually say something along the lines of ;-

Extra Skinny, Bootcut, Low-rise, Tight-Pocketed, Regular jeans. Great for partying, dancing clubbing, having fun with friends.

And thats just one label! What happened to 'A comfy pair of jeans with plenty of room?' In light of these ever so confusing and un-necessary labels I thought I would have a go at simplifying them. Here's what I came up with ;-

Extra-likely to be so tight that the circulation to your feet will become non-existent and you become paralysed from the waist down, but don't worry, your arse won't look big in them. Cut to go over your boots even though everyone conforms now and wears their boots over their jeans. Low enough to show any kind of underwear, so think twice before going commando. Pockets are tight enough to call people while you walk and send gibberish texts, then they will eat your hands when you try and retrieve your phone. Thoroughly irregular jeans. Great for keeping your legs straight and penguin impressions.

Or something like that.

The Fashion
I am far from fashion conscious, and am rather glad about that. In my opinion, as long as I'm comfy I really don't give a crap. Also I like to make my clothes work for their money, so I keep them until they have holes, have permanent stains or are simply too small. I can't be dealing with people who have to change their entire wardrobe every three months or so because they can't be caught dead in anything but the latest fashions. Pointless, money wasting way of going about things. I usually cringe when I walk into most clothes shops, seriously does anyone else think that most sleeves on tops these days look like the seamstress screwed up on the sewing machine? While most people see a menagerie of wonderful clothes, I see ;-
Clothes so creased that they put crinkle-cut chips to absolute shame, jeans so tight that Deep Vein Thrombosis will soon become 'the price of looking good', belts as thick as pillows with buckles the size of circular bin lids, or at least a decent vinyl record. Skirts that can actually pass of as belts if you wear them high enough, costume jewellry including rings as big as your face and looping ear-rings big enough for dolphins to jump through, and I don't think I even need to rant about Jeggings.

My point here is what happened to just being comfy? I'm sure people do find skinny jeans comfy, but I just don't see it myself.

All I wanted was a pair of jeans :)

I finally bought an Xbox

I always said that I'd never buy an Xbox. My friends would tell you that my Xbox rants were seemingly never ending. I hated them and I would always be a PS3 girl. Well, now I have an Xbox too.
The only reason that I decided to ignore the catastrophic fail-rate of the console is because I've managed to get my hands on a rather rare RPG that was never ported to PS3 in europe. So I bit the bullet and bought a 250GB 360 slim. So, was I right to rant so much about them, or has my mind been changed?

After owning it for around three weeks I can still say that there are more Con's than Pro's, but I'm still giving a fair review :P

The Design
Not too bad, though finger prints are in-escapable because of the shiny plastic shell, just like with the first gen PS3'S. It's useful that it stands comfortably when verticle, a downfall of the PS3 at least without a stand.  Still, despite having THREE ventilation grills (one on either side and one on top), the console still gets hot at the bottom after a short amount of time and stays cool at the top. Mine stands vertically on a hard, flat surface, as does my PS3, so I don't see why the ventilation should be so unbalanced if it is perfectly acceptable to stand it upright.
The touch-sensitive buttons, while they do make cool swishy sounds, are a little impractical. Not so much the power button, but eject button. While reaching for something close to the console, I accidentally knocked the button very very slightly and it opened the disc-tray, costing me half an hours worth of field training. Most annoying with big RPG'S :/
However, I do find the ma-hoo-sive power charger to be rather useful as, supposedly, It allows the console to stay on for an extra two minutes after a powercut. But I'm not sure how much use that really is if the tele has gone off?
Finally, I find it extremely annoying that every time you unplug the console, or switch it off at the main, the date and time of the system reset it self. In my case to 2005. I'm not sure why it can't save such a small amount of information and yet it can save an entirely edited avatar and all your gaming files after a mains switch off?

Design Rating - 6/10

The Interface
I actually really like the Xbox interface. Everything is big, obvious and easy to use and it's very easy to navigate :P

Interface Rating - 10/10

Xbox Live
I'm afraid that I can't offer my opinion on this one. I have no intention of paying 30-40 pounds a year just to play online multiplayer, but thats my choice. I know that you pay for the quality, as it apparently outstrips the PS3's online capabilities, but I'm not prepared to pay for it.

The Controllers
Yet another money-making aspect of the Xbox. I brought a spare controller with my console, and while the one I bought charges it's own battery pack from the console, the one that came in the box runs off batteries. Now, I did get some duracells with it, but they cost a bomb to buy after that at like 5 quid per pack, and everyone I'm sure prefers duracell to most other battery brands.
My point here, is that if the extra controllers that are sold separately are able to charge from the usb port on the console, then why not make them standard issue? If you're caught mid battle or mid mission and your batteries go and you don't have anymore, what can you do?
Anyway, the controllers aren't as bad to use as I thought. I've found them quite similar to the Nintendo GameCube controllers that I used to/ still use alot. And they seem to have slimmed them down to match the console. Always a plus.

Controller Rating - 4/10

Well, that pretty much sums it up. It's a bit better than I expected but not as great as everyone seems to say it is. I've given it a good chance and a fair review. I enjoy playing it (though I think thats more the fantastic RPG than the console) but there are alot of impractical aspects about it on the whole. I think I will always prefer a good PS3 =)

Overall Console Rating 6/10

Will you be my Valentine?

Valentine's Day is upon us again... such joy!
Now, while this day gives people a good opportunity to propose, or the courage to start up a relationship with a long time crush, does anyone else find it rather, well... pointless?

The Real Valentine's day
How many people really know why Valentine's Day is really called Valentine's Day? As it turns out, the original St.Valentine, renowned for his chastity, was actually martyred  on Feb 14th of some distant year or another, and is entirely unconnected to the day's events. By 'the day's events' I mean the fact that the Romans took this day to hold their annual 'Lupercalia' which means festival of youth. During the festival, young people picked their sweethearts by lottery. The traditional also stands that the first member of the opposite sex that you see on Valentine's morning is, supposedly, your true Valentine.
        
This is where, in some glorious, far-off paradise of an afterlife, Freud is shimmying around and pulling funny faces at all those who discredited his work on the Oedipus/Electra complex; because, for most of us, the first people we lay eyes on in the morning are our parents :-/ (note to self; wear a blindfold on Valentine's day in future.) Anyway, my point is, the martydom of a Saint hardly seems relevant to our own, consumerist version of the Lupercalia.

Card Shops
If you walk past any card shop after, say, the 20th January (or maybe even earlier!) all you will see is a mass of pink and red cards, balloons, teddybears, giant love hearts and a menagerie of other badly-designed heart-shaped merchandise. Actually, I believe that Clinton's Cards are selling huge, fabric roses with floppy fabric stems, the bloom of which is about the width of your average car tyre. If anyone, anyone at all can tell me what on earth a woman would do with such a thing (within reason) then please let me know, because it puzzles me greatly!

Also, I'm not the 'greenest' person in the world, but surely making and kind of greetings card, for any oaccasion, uses trees? So why has no-one ever suggested cutting back on the amount of cards that are made? Is it really worth a whole tree to make a bunch of 'Happy Christmas, From The Dog' cards?  I know that we have recycling now but please, has it really come to such a point that we need Valentine's cards to let someone know that we love them?
Woo, apologies, greetings cards by themselves are worth a whole blog! - Moving on ...

The Man's Role
It turns out that I am lucky enough to have a boyfriend who absolutely adores Valentine's Day more than most people I know, and i greatly appreciate the amazing bunch of flowers (including Columbian Roses! It was repeatedly stressed) and card that I recieved despite my lack-lustre approach to the day's festivities. Valentine's Day is possibly one of the most stressful days for men. They ask their girlfriends, well in advance, what they would like for the oaccasion and most women say 'Nothing'. And still the man has to face the angry/disappointed face when they give them exactly what they asked for - nothing. Unknown to men, 'nothing' actually means - 'A romantic surprise of some sort'. That in itself could mean a number of cliche scenario's involving rose petals, dimmed light, cheesy music and jewellry. 

Why can't women actually answer the man's question truthfully?
A great Valentine's day for me would be a nice meal, payed for equally, either out or in, then home with some choccie to either watch a film/play halo together and then go to bed for some cuddles (and such). But unfortunately my lovely boyfriend studies away and went home yesterday =(.

Bi-polar
Valentine's Day is also a holiday that leaves the whole world thoroughly divided. One half croons at each other in overly-public places, being watched by the other half who skulk in dark corners, rocking back and forth with bitterness. So really they just get their faces rubbed in the fact that they are lonely, which isn't fair at all. There must be millions of depressed, single people out there on Valentine's Day and card shops and restaurants don't do them any favours.

Heart-Broken
I'm sure you get the general gist of my thoughts on the matter by now, but please don't consider me a party pooper =) By all means, be elaborate and whimsical, buy your partners heaps of presents and shower them in love. But ladies, if you asked for 'nothing' and got 'nothing', then be happy, because you have everything you asked for, and not many of us can say that. And Gentlemen, best of luck.

If you need Valentine's Day to assure yourself that you partner loves you more than anything, even when they probably tell you that all the time, then start listening a bit more instead of placing your confidence in giant fabric roses and badly rhymed verses in mass produced Valentine's cards.

In the words of Oscar Wilde, or at least the modern adaptation of his novel, Dorian Gray - Some things are more precious because they don't last.

Happy Valentine's Day!!